One strap or two?

As I was carrying my baby bag today (it's a backpack) I was reminded how strange it is that not only do clothing and accessories come in and out of fashion, but the way we wear them also changes. I thought of this as I put both straps of the bag around my shoulders, instead of just one. Does anyone else remember when it was only cool to wear one strap of your backpack? Those people with both straps firmly pressed into their shoulders were like the rolly backpack people of the 2000s. Then, someone got smart, decided to make wearing both straps cool, and I don't know about you, but I breathed a sigh of relief. My left shoulder was so thankful to take a load off. Then we got the chest-enhancing-strap-across-the-front bags. It didn't take me long to realize that look did not work for me.

I tried to think of some similar changes - roll the bottom of your jeans or not? socks to your knees or socks out of sight? several earrings for each ear or just one?...They were all fashionable at some point in my life. And what changed about the way these things looked except that everyone looked similar? Nothing. But I've embraced this happily. It's comforting to join the crowd sometimes. We all do it and there's a reason. It gives comfort and a feeling of familiarity. I think our brains definitely gravitate to the familiar. This explains why we often end up with similar political and ethical viewpoints as our families or close friends. I don't think it's a bad thing at all. What is most interesting, though, is what makes us so different. Why do we reject some of those same popular trends while gladly accepting so many others? How do we decide? I don't know, but it's something to think about. In fact, it's important to think about because it sheds light on more serious aspects of our lives. Like why we choose to vote a certain way or why we take a certain stance on an important social issue. How much of our decisions are based on things totally unrelated to the issue at hand? Have we taken the time to at least attempt to throw away bias and see through the eyes of another person? Have we tried to be convinced and have we considered why someone else might stand on the other side of the fence? One thing I know for sure is when I think something is clear, black & white, unable to be challenged, I have not searched hard enough for another intelligent viewpoint. It is almost always there, waiting to challenge me.

Life is much more interesting, clear, confusing, scary, difficult to understand, unpredictable, beautiful, exciting...when you realize how diverse we truly are, for varied reasons. So today as you put on the skinny jeans you would never dream of wearing 10 years ago, celebrate that feeling of familiarity and find whatever it is that makes you you - separate from your family, community, church - and celebrate that, too.

The Lovers, the Dreamers, and Aunt Whitney

Aunt Whitney and her boyfriend Nathan finally got to come visit Ella a few weeks ago (I don't have a good sense of time lately so I'm not sure exactly when).
Anyways, I was pretty excited to see Whitney myself. It's pretty sad that she's not around as much anymore, but I have to say she has always been extremely busy so I'm used to it.
Before Ella was born, Kevin and I decided we would have to prepare for the day Ella realized Whitney is living Cinder-ella, her namesake. We know the day will come that mommy and daddy are losers and Whitney is the light of her life. That is fine with me! I can't blame her.
Whitney is a wonderful role model. I have actually never felt like her older sister. If anything, I feel I should ask her for advice and follow her example. She is optimistic but also realistic. She sums up what life should be about - happiness, fun, beauty. She celebrates beauty in everything she does. She strives to do good and show kindness to others - and always has.
I pray often - now and before Ella was born - that she will be like Whitney. Not that life is easy for her or that everything is peachy, but in the way she responds to the life we have been given. I have seen Whitney stressed, angry, annoyed, but I have never seen the core of her character change. If I could bottle her ability to see the good in things, move past the negative and move on to bigger and better achievements, the world would be a much brighter place and I would be much richer. Ok, ok, maybe I put her on a pedestal a bit...maybe Whitney doesn't agree with anything I'm saying about her, but I would guess that anyone else you ask would have the same things to say.
The other night I looked in the front of the Bible I have had for a long time. It had my name and that it was from my parents, etc. written in pretty cursive. Underneath my name, in somewhat unperfected script, was "& Whitney Garmon." I remember seeing this when I was little and yelling at Whitney. I was sooo upset that my Bible was no longer spotless...especially at the most important part -- my name!! It was ironic that a big smile spread across my face when I saw it this time. It makes that Bible even more special to me now. Whitney and I share a faith in God that is very different in nature, but also the same. It reminds me of how different every person's journey is and how God shapes our lives to create so many different outcomes so that we can make various changes to the world. I now welcome Whitney's name on any of my possessions now, including Ella Rose. I hope her mark is deep and lasting there.

Spit Happens

So daddy didn't wear the gray shirt to his birthday party after all...luckily he has 7 other of the exact shirts in different colors.

So Beary Happy

Last Monday, I believe Ella smiled/laughed genuinely for the first time (she was 5 wks.). The picture featured at the top of the page is from that moment.
My mom yelled at me to come into the room that has her pack n play at their house. When I peeked over, I saw her grinning at the little bears on the mobile above her. She thinks they are hilarious. They are just plain white teddy bears on a VERY slow moving mobile...I have no idea what she is thinking, but I'm sure it's something like..."Bears are so not supposed to fly. And if they did, surely they wouldn't go that slow. What a funny mobile."

Anyway, I'm not sure if I've ever experienced the kind of joy that appeared in my heart that moment. We have spent every moment with her trying to reproduce that laugh. Her daddy has come very close...he is pretty goofy.

Just-In Time

So today is J bizzle's birthday. Sorry the post is going up now, but this day has been the most ridiculous day ever. I am a pro at not finishing to-do lists. I never even get close...and today, even though I worked on it all day long, I crossed out about 3 out of 30 things. Here is one:

Justin and I have known each other for 8 years now. We met on a youth mission's trip to Trinidad and Tobago. In fact, we shared the 4 hour sweaty fish smelling bus trip around Tobago's mountains...yeah, we fell asleep. After the 3rd view of the ocean, we got the point.

If I wrote every funny memory that I have shared with Justin in one blog, it would probably explode the computer and you would all have to scroll for days to read the other posts. I can't even believe how many moments are scrolling through my mind right now. I'm trying to pick my favorite but there is no way. Some that come to mind include a picture of Justin rolling a suitcase down Robertsville Road, beer pineapples, and "I've been sittin here...tryin to find myself..."

Justin is definitely not only good for a laugh. He's a passionate, opinionated, talented individual. I would have never pegged him as one to be into politics, but I have been surprised lately. Don't be fooled - he has done his research, whether you agree with him or not. Much much more than other young people our age, he attempts to be informed enough to back up his arguments. Of course he is also a talented singer and worship leader. I think the latter talent is due to his desire to be genuine. I know his ultimate goal is to just be honest.

So here's to J dawg. On this wonderful day we celebrate the birth of a legend. Ella will have NO END of stories about her only blood uncle.

September 15, 1986 at 9:15 pm

On this day 22 years ago, my husband was born. I was already running around and talking to everyone when he was just learning to eat and breathe. Little did I know my future love was sleeping in Oak Ridge, TN that day. And I could never know that he would help me produce such a beautiful thing as Ella Rose.
Even though he likes to take his birthday privileges too far, he does deserve to be celebrated. He is a wonderful wonderful husband and father. I don't know if I would ever ask for more. He is such a hard worker and has a compassionate heart. He is confident, intelligent, and the most trustworthy person I know. He tells me I am beautiful and that he loves me AT LEAST once a day, very frequently 3 or 4 times a day. I honestly believe he has not missed one day since we were married. When he told me I should be told I was beautiful every day before we even started dating, I thought it was a really bad pick up line - but he was not lying!
At 22, he is able to have a career that he loves with all his heart - something few people can claim. I know he would never settle for anything else. He is strong for me when I need him and knows when to push me to stand on my own.
I really feel he makes me a better person.
He is almost always happy and never ever sees the glass half empty. He does not know how to live any other way except to live every moment to the fullest. He is the funniest person I know.
So today, I celebrate the love of my life!! I love you and you are the most ruggedly handsome man I know!!! =) (those are the terms he prefers....you know he is particular)

The Hands Say It All

When I was little, I took piano lessons. I think my mom always wished someone had made her take lessons (or maybe she did take lessons), but either way she wanted me to have a chance of learning at an early age. That's the same way I feel about Ella and dance. I'd like to put her in it just so she has the choice of continuing it in her future. Dance is one of those talents that usually has to be developed from an early age, especially if you're going towards the more structured types, like ballet. So she can quit if she doesn't like it, but at least she'll have the option.
Back to the subject:
In my lessons, I remember the teacher commenting on my long fingers. Apparently I could've been a wonderful piano player because of that - but it turns out learning to play any musical instrument is a horrible chore for me so I quit.
When I got married, we discovered that Kevin also has long fingers. Long fingers + Long fingers = Ella's long fingers. Her fingers are very dainty and beautiful. She holds her hands equally beautifully, whatever she is doing. Depending on her mood, she will hold her hand up to you as if to say, "Please, please hush. I am resting here and you are entirely too loud." Sometimes she will just grab your finger and hold on tight. She even grabbed my nose and pinched it as hard as she could the other night. I could barely get it free! Whatever she is doing with her hands, you can be sure they are trying to tell you something.

These are a few of my favorite things...

I thought I'd share some of Ella's very favorite things:

*Bathtime - at every bath she splashes and grins, never crying - I tell her every time about Aunt Teddie's pool and how fun it will be next summer!

*Boppy - especially when it vibrates and plays noises that sound like mommy's belly!

*Snuggling on a shoulder - after she gets done looking around at everything, she'll drift off to sleep!


*KISSES!! - I open my mouth wide for mommy's kisses!

*Snuggling in the sling - Well, this might be more mommy's favorite; we aren't sure if she likes it or not, depending on if her constant grunting means comfort or frustration...

50th Golden - Jim & Pat Taylor

Last Saturday, our family celebrated Kevin's grandparents' 50th anniversary. It was the first official event hosted at our house. We have waited so long because we've never felt the house was ready, but I think it's about time we don't care if the house is perfect...it's good enough! Judging by how this party went, we need to have many more...and quick! It turned out to be a great day. Kevin and Tammy made the most amazing steaks ever and all the food was wonderful. Kevin's uncle and cousin were able to come up from Atlanta and surprise Jim and Pat also. It was a joy to be able to celebrate with everyone.



It is truly an accomplishment to have spent 50 years with someone. As I thought about that, I wondered how many golden 50s will be around when I am in my 70s. It seems like no one stays with anything for 50 years today - much less with another human being. I decided to actually look up the divorce statistic and was reminded that it is actually not as high as we all think. Ask yourself right now: How many marriages end in divorce in the U.S. today? ... Did you say 1/2? Well, I have some more optimistic news. I remember learning about this in a class I took at UT called "The History of Love and Marriage in the US." As quoted by Dan Hurley in the New York Times in 2005:

"How many American marriages end in divorce? One in two, if you believe the
statistic endlessly repeated in news media reports, academic papers and
campaign speeches.

The figure is based on a simple - and flawed - calculation: the annual
marriage rate per 1,000 people compared with the annual divorce rate. In
2003, for example, the most recent year for which data is available, there
were 7.5 marriages per 1,000 people and 3.8 divorces, according to the
National Center for Health Statistics.

But researchers say that this is misleading because the people who are
divorcing in any given year are not the same as those who are marrying, and
that the statistic is virtually useless in understanding divorce rates. In
fact, they say, studies find that the divorce rate in the United States has
never reached one in every two marriages, and new research suggests that,
with rates now declining, it probably never will.

The method preferred by social scientists in determining the divorce rate is
to calculate how many people who have ever married subsequently divorced.
Counted that way, the rate has never exceeded about 41 percent, researchers
say. Although sharply rising rates in the 1970's led some to project that
the number would keep increasing, the rate has instead begun to inch
downward.

"At this point, unless there's some kind of turnaround, I wouldn't expect
any cohort to reach 50 percent, since none already has," said Dr. Rose M.
Kreider, a demographer in the Fertility and Family Statistics Branch of the
Census Bureau."

Well, there's a bit of good news for the day. Here's to golden 50ths!

--By the way, my grandparents have also celebrated their 50th anniversary...I believe this year will be 55?...What amazing examples do Kevin and I have!!!

Go Big Orange

We searched everywhere looking for the perfect outfit for football season. There were no girly outfits for little babies anywhere! They had onesies, but they didn't clearly proclaim "I'm a girl" so I was not a fan...my goal is to never have anyone call her a "he" or ask if she's a girl. That just doesn't feel right...a girl should look like a girl from the beginning. We found cute little dresses, but they were for 2 and 3 year olds...I was beginning to think I'd have to give in to unisex onesies and just stick an orange bow in her hair. UNTIL...Kmart to the rescue...who would have thought?? KMart?? Sure enough, a 0-3 month cheerleading uniform!! I was quite excited. Surely no one will have to ask the dreaded question, "girl or boy?" now. However, despite our girliest-stroller-in-the-store purple and pink with butterflies all over it AND cheerleading outfit AND pink and purple diaper bag, a woman in Las Margaritas definitely asked if she was a boy or girl.

I could have done nothing more to prevent it from happening. Some people just can't be helped. Oh well.

The important thing is, our whole family matched in our big orange on game day and Ella was adorable!

Yearbook Yourself

Busy Day

Ella had a busy day on Friday. We woke up and scrambled to get ready before Mimi (grandma on dads side) and L came to visit. L is our former pastor's wife and she wanted to meet the baby. After eating with them, we came back home to get ready for a photography session. A girl I used to play with when I was in diapers is now starting a photography business, so she came and took some pictures in our house. It was a lot of fun and we'll post the results soon. For now, here is a preview of her beauty:


Then, uncle J came and held her for awhile. Ella picked up some of his attitude I guess.



We should send this to Clint Brown for an idea for his next cd cover. (I'm sorry if you don't know who Clint Brown is...)



Finally, some good friends of ours from our former church came to town and stopped by for a wonderful visit. Some other friends of ours that live in Cleveland were also there. They have an adorable little girl who was able to meet Ella too:






She was very tired after this day! This is her first nap in her big girl crib - We're so glad we got to see so many of our friends!